Seems like an easy question, right? We've been looking at ourselves all of our lives, filling out forms with our descriptions... brown hair, brown eyes, 5'2"...
Maybe it's age, or maybe it's the fact that I have lost 30 pounds this year... but either way I see myself in pictures and I am always a little surprised. For the first 24 years of my life I was super skinny. The kind of skinny where other people often said "You're so thin, you disappear when you turn sideways" or "You're so skinny it makes me sick." It was never intentional, just a fabulous metabolism that offset my penchant for chocolate and alfredo sauce. So when I started taking some medication that slowed me down, it was a SHOCK. Wow. The weight just started to pack on. My clothes didn't fit anymore. My body felt different. Yet each time I walked by the mirror, I was surprised to see this new person. Evidence of the weight gain was all over my closet and my puffy ankles, but my mind could not wrap around the changes in my reflection. Who was that person? And pictures? Fahgedaboutit! THAT was not me. I was still the skinny girl... right? Wasn't I? Not anymore.
Fast forward 10 years. Thanks to a realization that the freedom to eat whatever I wanted only gave me the freedom to be fat, I decided to change up my life. To finally get healthy. What example was I setting for my son? I carefully prepared his meals, then sabotaged myself with cookies. So I finally shed 30+ pounds. But now, I don't know what I look like again. I had to take a picture of myself the other day because I didn't know what I actually looked like. The mirror played tricks on me. Was I that fat girl who longed to remember the skinny days? Was the skinny girl back? Or was this a new blend of old and new... a healthier, more mature me, with an older face, an older mind and a body that finally made sense.
The picture was about what I expected, but still... a nice surprise. I think it will take a while for my mind and my reflection to be in sync.
So... do you know what you look like?
Maybe it's age, or maybe it's the fact that I have lost 30 pounds this year... but either way I see myself in pictures and I am always a little surprised. For the first 24 years of my life I was super skinny. The kind of skinny where other people often said "You're so thin, you disappear when you turn sideways" or "You're so skinny it makes me sick." It was never intentional, just a fabulous metabolism that offset my penchant for chocolate and alfredo sauce. So when I started taking some medication that slowed me down, it was a SHOCK. Wow. The weight just started to pack on. My clothes didn't fit anymore. My body felt different. Yet each time I walked by the mirror, I was surprised to see this new person. Evidence of the weight gain was all over my closet and my puffy ankles, but my mind could not wrap around the changes in my reflection. Who was that person? And pictures? Fahgedaboutit! THAT was not me. I was still the skinny girl... right? Wasn't I? Not anymore.
Fast forward 10 years. Thanks to a realization that the freedom to eat whatever I wanted only gave me the freedom to be fat, I decided to change up my life. To finally get healthy. What example was I setting for my son? I carefully prepared his meals, then sabotaged myself with cookies. So I finally shed 30+ pounds. But now, I don't know what I look like again. I had to take a picture of myself the other day because I didn't know what I actually looked like. The mirror played tricks on me. Was I that fat girl who longed to remember the skinny days? Was the skinny girl back? Or was this a new blend of old and new... a healthier, more mature me, with an older face, an older mind and a body that finally made sense.
The picture was about what I expected, but still... a nice surprise. I think it will take a while for my mind and my reflection to be in sync.
So... do you know what you look like?
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